Initially we had web cams, I got rid of mine, he still had his and just put it away a couple months ago (5).
I had always wondered why he kept it set up right next to his computer when we didn’t use it anymore with each other.
The high reward and low cost nature of online cheating makes it difficult to stop.
But from your perspective, it is REAL; it feels like cheating and it hurts just the same (see online cheating). First, attempts to control a partner’s behavior, often fail.
Simply put, many people don’t consider online chatting/sex to be cheating.
But, the problem with this is twofold: Because online chatting/sex is rewarding but not very costly (one can easily control how, when, and where it happens), people are easily drawn to it.
Typically, what happens when you try to control a partner’s behavior, especially a behavior that is very rewarding to him, a partner will learn to better hide or conceal his activities (see when people lie).
And it may help to be realistic about how much both you and your boyfriend can change with respect to this issue.
4 months before he asked me to marry him he wrote and I quote "awe you left i was gonna say hit me up on yahoo sometime and i’ll show you whatever you like same sn as aff *** take care.... and his ideal match is a woman that’s not afraid to say exactly what she wants. I don’t how often he’s does things-chats, gets on the phone, I don’t even know if he does it anymore... I’m not about to purchase something to hook up to the computer to follow what he does...I’ve spent more and more time here for the past 6 months, since we’ve got engaged, so I’ve used his computer a lot more as well.I was messing around one day and found a ton of pornography on it.I’ve been with my fiancé for a little over 2.5 years now. We’ve lived an hour apart for our entire relationship except for the past month or so, I’m in the middle of moving in.We’d still see each other every weekend, sometimes more.In these types of situations, it is common for people to offer quick solutions, but easy solutions typically don’t work long term (see once a cheater).