Are you asking why men don't continue behaving towards you the way you want them to after you break up with them for reasonable reasons? I think that's admirable but are you expecting them to listen as to you as you expound on why your new guy is so much better than your last or ask them about how to handle your new guy? You would not be judging them for not meeting YOUR needs. But it's such a dark world when the mature and loving thing to do when a relationship ends is...cut someone out of your life forever? So you can never cheer them up when they're down. They will shut you out, and all that time together is dust. Coming from a guy who tried to remain friends with his ex for years after the break up - it's not easy. I worked hard to make her happy and was met with criticisms and emotional distance. It was painful watching her be happy and knowing it wasn't because of me, as selfish as that sounds.
Maye you're misunderstanding those "reasonable" reasons. And what exactly does a girl, who is my friend, who was my ex... That face you saw every day and is living not 10 miles down the road, you never get to see again - they are dead to you, and that is right and normal and human. It was painful being the person she ran to when her subsequent relationships fell apart.
In general, Hussey recommends keeping a distance from your ex, or risk getting intimately involved again.
"If you try and stay too close to someone, you will always end up at that place: back in bed," Hussey warned.
While others may disagree, a typical gay/lesbian romantic relationship starts as is.
Few are considered to be rooted from friendship before it grew into something significant that’s why breaking up could mean detaching from each other forever.
If it's painful for them to see you, especially while they are under a lot of social pressure not to show that hurt, then it's most loving on your part to respect that and give up wanting them to go against what they need to serve your wants, which, if you look at it from your exes' POV is selfish of you. If you really cared about these men, you would be happy that they were doing what they needed to do to care for themselves after a painful break up. I've heard the - it's selfish to want to stay friends - argument before. Or at least that is their goal, and they always achieve it in the end. I initiated the break up, but i didn't want it. But looking back, it was a good decision as there was nowhere for that particular relationship to go.
But what about the fact that you shared so much memories with your ex? All these points were brought up during one of the most engaging debates on guy Q, Ask Men's Q&A platform. Then of course, after catching up and feeling close to them, I hear nothing from them.
I cannot understand the point of relationships is you can't gather anything lasting from them. Why are some men so cold that they can just switch their feelings on and off at will? I am so tired of dating men when I can't even get a friendship to show for it.
A May 2016 study by researchers at Oakland University even found that participants who displayed so-called "dark personality traits," including narcissism and psychopathy, were more likely to stay close to their exes for "practical and sexual reasons." Of course, it's not always possible to stay away, especially if you have kids together or work in the same office.
Even without those complications, going cold turkey can still seem daunting.
Don’t rush the friendship to re-emerge after a bad break-up. Make sure that you already let him/her go even before deciding to become friends with him/her.