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* Caucasian women are twice as likely to respond to Caucasian men than African-American men.* African-American men are more likely to respond to women of different races but receive three times more responses from African-American women than a non-black woman.That they’re actively harboring racist fantasies about certain minority groups? I think they genuinely don’t feel all hot and bothered when thinking about them.But there is definitely a reason beyond “they just don’t do it for me.”This is about social forces shaping our preferences, and we’ll never progress without acknowledging that fact. And our society has tacitly decided that those guidelines only apply to your professional life.Because people become the most neurotic versions of themselves on their quest for True Love, and that’s totally allowed. Here’s the thing: when asked during in-person meetings, 90% of my clients report having racial preferences. And I’m not just talking about white-on-white preferences.

* Asian, Hispanic and Caucasian women prefer Caucasian men while Caucasian men are more likely to respond to everyone but Caucasian women.* African-American women prefer all races over Caucasian men but are the least likely to get a response from all men.“The big thing we’re learning is the difference between stated preference and actual behavior, and that’s a big deal,” First Data Analyst Josh Fischer said in an interview with USA Today.To take one of the most obvious and simple examples, consider Hollywood, which is notoriously white. That means the math equation looks something like this: If Hollywood=White, and Hollywood=Hot, then White=Hot. We are not the passive victims of our own internalized biases. As author and psychologist James Giles writes, “That is not to say that romantic attraction is fully under our control, but only that it is not fully our control.” So when are our love lives going to start reflecting that? People are happy to acknowledge that hiring someone based on their skin is racist.According to the 20 Hollywood Diversity Report, minorities “remain underrepresented on every front.” They’ve reported that “more than half of films had casts that were 10% minority or less.” (The Every Single Word Spoken project is a great illustration of this.) Hollywood is also hot. The problem is that no one is inundating us with hot Asian guys, or hot black women who aren’t Kerry Washington. Studies have shown that we are attracted to what we know and are used to, but as Deborah Ward writes, “Repeated exposure to certain people will increase our attraction toward them.” This means that a conscious change in behavior will impact subconscious desires. Whether workplaces to their goals of diversity is another, much longer, discussion, but the guidelines are there. But somehow, dating someone based on their skin is not. Selector .selector_input_interaction .selector_input. Selector .selector_input_interaction .selector_spinner.

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