In some instances he ‘knows’ his wife is cheating on him and looks the other way.
In other instances his defenses are so thick he doesn’t read the signs at least consciously.
Personally, I think most if not all married people know on some level if a spouse is cheating, but that’s just my belief.
Anyway, the married man like his supposed competition is afraid of a deeper intimacy as well. His willingness to live in a limited marital relationship thinly disguises this fear of deeper love and intimacy.
But for the ‘other man’ this is a painful transition from a illusory relationship with a married woman in a triangle with a married man to a period of being alone again where some serious work can be done on his love-life (if he’s up for it).
The work needed is usually in the area of developing a better tolerance for love and intimacy by clearing out whatever fears and blocks the guy has in the way.
Usually at the beginning of such an arrangement, when the triangle is young so to speak, the ‘other man’ usually tells himself he likes this arrangement because he doesn’t have to make a commitment.Fundamentally, they are unstable, like three legs on a table.Something always goes wrong, or at least it should, because triangles usually end up hurting people more than anything else.All three people in this triangular arrangement have their issues.Let’s do one at a time starting with the ‘other man.’ He is definitely looking for love in the wrong place and with the wrong person.I know the story books tell us that it’s better to stay together.